Are you ready for Marraige?

Have you asked all the right questions?
Have you discussed important issues like finances, the background of your intended, sex, or whatever else might be important to you?
Do you want to get married now just because of the pressure your parents are putting on you or because most of your friends are married?
The last conference call for the year 2008 will focus on some questions to ask yourself and your intended to let you know if you are truly ready for marriage.

Are you a male??????
What do men want from a woman in a relationship/marriage?
What do you think women want from a man?

Are you a Female???????
What do women want from a man in a relationship?
What do you think men want from a woman?

Becoming Ready for Marriage

As a single man or woman, when we get to a certain age we automatically think we are ready to get married but the truth is most times we don't know what we want, why we want to get married, what we deserve, and what to expect.
The next conference call will focus on some questions to ask yourself and your intended to let you know if you are truly ready for marriage.

Relationship: Long or short term, May be or Maybe not

Are you in a relationship that you don't know where it is heading?
Do you want a long term relationship but the other party is unsure?
Are you courting out of what people think is not the norm?
Can you change his or her thoughts on taking your relationship to the next level because you are ready?

Join us on the conference call this saturday at 9am EST to get tips and view points on how to know if it would be a long term relationship or if the relationship is going anywhere at all.

What’s sex got to do with it?

Sex has become a common tool used around the world today in different shapes and forms. It is a big business everywhere you look which stems from the entertainment industry, the medical field (cosmetic surgery), fashion, prostitution, pornography,TV and radio shows. Be very sensitive to your environment and what drives your thoughts because sex is driven by so many things around us. Sex out of marriage is filthy and cheap period.

God created sex for 3 main reasons

• It is a bonding tool and a powerful binding force. Sex in itself cannot sustain a relationship as a bond. Genesis 2:24
• For procreation; there is no way to multiply without sex at least for most people. Genesis 1:28
• It is sacred, pleasurable, and a beautiful thing to be enjoyed by two people (male and female) as one in marriage. Proverbs 5:19

Most men don’t necessarily equate sex with emotions, women on the other hand gets attached emotionally and physically after sex.

You are not married until you are married, being engaged and having a wedding date ahead is no passport to sex.

Remember once your innocence is gone you cannot get it back BUT you can become a secondary virgin because we operate under the grace of God.

Some questions to ponder on

The next conference call would be opened to any question and no question is off limit... This is just a head start.

• Should I wait for a man whom is not where he needs to be financially and constantly needing help?
• How do you recover from a broken heart and is there a time frame to wait before getting into another relationship?
• How can you tell if a guy really wants you or just wants to be with you for sex alone?
• It is a sin to have premarital sex but how does one stop once one have started?

Have any questions, feel free to post it on the comment page.

Education and Commitment

Education

How important is the level of education of your potential mate?

Education goes beyond academics and also depends greatly on your background. Education is how opened one is being exposed to different things in life in regards to culture, thoughts, ideas, interpretation of issues and events. Some men prefer not to marry a woman that has several college degrees above what they have acquired and some women prefer men with a minimum level of education which can vary. As a woman it is important to choose a man that meets the level of educational requirement that you need or have set for yourself because you want a man that would not only make logical decisions but also lead you the right way.

Commitment

Think about things you do each day and how much commitment you dedicate to them; every single thing we do in life involves some type of commitment but with varying degrees. Commitment is a pledge or assurance to be there regardless of what happens and when it happens, it can vary depending on the stage you are in your relationship from friendship, courtship, engagement to marriage. In any relationship compatibility is very paramount because it causes people to break their vows and commitment to each other which in turn causes distrust. It is impossible to make any kind of relationship work without commitment be it your relationship with God, or the person you are courting or married to. Being committed to the wrong person or thing would lead to a bitter end and would stop you from accomplishing what God has intended for you. Your first and primary commitment should be your personal relationship with God, yourself and then others. It is important to know how deeply the person you are committing yourself to is committed to their faith, family, friends and promises they make which can be a benchmark for you to know how committed they would be to you. Your potential mate should be one that is committed to accomplishing your goal and vision and vice versa.

Wande

Part I: Courtship: Thing of the past or tool for the future ?

Courtship: Thing of the past or tool for the future?

Once upon a time, in the “pre-ipodic” era, charming debonair princes would gallantly display chivalry and bravery to win the affection of graceful damsels whom they desired to court under parental approval and surveillance of course! (Crickets in the background). Yeah, fast forward to about 10 minutes ago; welcome to the modern technology age, where head bobbing youths, like myself, mostly determine mate eligibility from e-compatibility tests, emotional inklings, and let’s not forget Facebook profiles. Today, those princes would be clowned as punks, and the damsels? You got it, high-maintenance drama queens.

Why are times so topsy-turvy? Whatever happened to good old courtship, which ensured lovebirds a conducive environment to effectively communicate and learn about each other without having to succumb to beckoning hormonal distractions?

Is courtship a thing of the past or a tool for the future? ,

To address a host of relationship issues, Relationships Expert, Mrs. Olu Adetutu of Greater Tomorrows, Inc. hosts a series of interactive conference call sessions. On March 29th, courtship was discussed; I dialed in and got a much needed dose of reality as Mrs. Adetutu delivered the truth with accuracy and scriptural support.

Courtship, she said, is the quintessential paths that can land you a spot at the coveted prime intersection of wedding avenue and happily-ever-after lane, if done the right way that is. During courtship, information on prospective mates is objectively gathered and scrutinized without fuzzy emotional biases.

Prov 24:5 says ‘a wise man is mightier than a strong man’ and 2nd Corinthians 6 :14 says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” So does it not make sense to gain wisdom and a good understanding of whether or not you and this Ms. Perfect are equally yoked aka compatible? Better yet it would be behooving to know if Mr. Right is a believer in, say marital fidelity… hey you never know. It is good practice not to assume, as that might lead to frequent jogs down Surprise Street just to catch up with your partner’s reality. To avoid that emotional turmoil,

Critical areas Mrs. Adetutu advises need careful evaluation are:

· Background
· Religion and spirituality
· Sexuality and Affection
· Temperament and character
· Financial Responsibility
· Roles and spousal expectations
· Others

Again the surprise street marathon awaits many unprepared sprinters. So whether or not you are a relic of the pre-ipodic age, the fact is knowledge about your relationships is a powerful tool. Mrs. Adetutu’s passion is to help people make better choices, attract compatible mates and have long lasting fulfilled lives. And to think I needed a MySpace page to attract compatible mates? So for the curious, interested or even skeptical souls; call in, listen to the archives, and leave a comment. I will listening in on the next call, April 19th, so till then be safe and thrive. ………..
Moyeen A .

Love Vs Infatuation

Love vs. Infatuation

Summary of the last conference call (3/1/2008): Three types of love in the Greek language are

Eros – Erotic passionate love

Agape – God’s love, sacrificial love, unconditional love, non expectant love, love you show regardless of if the person deserves it or not

Phileo – best friend love, one of the most important types of love in any relationship.

If you cannot involve these three types of love in your relationship you need to back up and reevaluate.

Compatibility

Compatibility is a major key in any form of courtship or marriage. Compromising compatibility because of romantic sentiments especially in areas of religion, vision, and background may result in a very painful end. Most times we are too engulfed in the romance part of our relationship that we forget about all other important aspect that makes up a relationship. You should have a list of uncompromising things that you must have in a mate in order not to make the wrong choice. Also, have a bench mark of what is important to you not what you desire or prefer but what you need. Now, its not just about putting up a list, you have to know whom you are as a person in order to be able to assess someone else.

Some questions to ponder on
Would YOU marry YOU?
Is this person worth a lifetime investment?
What are things about your partner that YOU need to know and
how important are these things?
Who are YOU?
What do YOU have to offer an intended mate?
Whom can YOU live with?
Are we compatible spiritually, intellectually, mentally, socially etc?
Put on your thinking caps and think people. Take a minute and ponderrrrr.....